THE LEXICON OF FOOLS: 5 Tragic Stories of Love & Misery

CHAPTER II

The Cat's Soliloquy

FIRST ACT

SCENE – A trendy oasis at the heart of the city, lights dim. [A woman is seated on a stool at the counter of the bar]

WOMAN: I can give you everything except the one thing you want most. In the name of Love, you will deny its importance at first, but it will soon frustrate you as it will upset me. It is only a matter of time before you tire from the ordeal.

Don’t flatter me, boy. The unfortunate truth is there really isn’t anything more than that. I’m nothing exceptional and neither am I a woman of substance. [Snickers]One can’t even say of me, “she’s no different from other women except for her competence in my private chambers!”

Don’t flatter yourself, boy. There is no difference and you will not make a difference. Many have tried and all have failed. When you realize your efforts are futile you will turn your back on me and leave…just like everybody else.

It is only merciful if you save me the heartbreak, and yourself, the trouble and we’ll skip right to the part where we should be good friends. [Downs her drink and leaves]

ACT – DROP.

Azumanga Daioh!!!

You are Sakaki-san! I want to meet you. In fact,
everyone does. You're the coolest person out
there. You are just inherently cool. But...
you wish you weren't. You'd give it all up for
being cute. Really really cute. You become
obsessed by things and focus on them 100% of
the time... and never with any results. You
get easily embarrased and are very shy. You
rarely feel comfortable in your own body. You
try to protect your friends, and you always win
whatever you do... without even trying. You'd
like to be good with animals, but they ussually
just use you... and sometimes abuse you. But
they are the most important things in the
world, along with cuteness and emotions. You
tend to try to hide your inner shyness with a
mask of indifference, but really, there's
nothing to hide. You are just really cool.
Your best friend would be a Kagura, and you
should defenitely go into whatever field suits
you best. You are good at everything, so just
do what you love doing!

The Azumanga Daioh Character Quiz
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